just as the discrimination of non-white people or the mentally ill is
also a terrible injustice. The end of the second millennium saw things
change drastically. Thankfully.
The changes are still happening. There are still many gender inequalities.
The feminist movement has given many women a new identity and pride in
their gender. But there are many, many women who call themselves
feminists but aren't. They're people who want the good things that come
with feminism and the good things that come with traditional
expectations women could have.
It's very simple things like opening the door for a woman or paying for
their drinks. I've been out with a pseudo-feminist. She was happy to
have all the things that were expected from men 40 years ago but without
all the bad stuff. She expected to be treated as an equal, which I
always do, but was also happy to accept the unequal positive treatment
that benefited her.
In the Third Sector woman often dominate though still men are seen at
the dominating Chief Executive positions. I'm an equalist. I demand
gender equality. In the Third Sector I've been lambasted many a time for
my ways and my ideals. This sort of feminism is really misandropy. It's
denying men their right to be and their right to be who they are.
I'm sure behind my back I was considered a misogynist but I'm nothing of
the sort. I have some traditional values about respecting women and
treating them well but I'm first and foremost an equalitist. I was
brought up in a matriarchal family environment. Sri Lankans generally
are at least in my community though there are exceptions to the rule.
Gender equality is as vital as all other equality but there are many
women who use the ideals of feminism to suppress men's way of being.
It's not surprising there's such a high young male suicide rate when
men's ideology of being is suppressed and termed misogyny.
I've already blogged on this suppression of men's right to be men
em-bound in the language. The antonym of feminism is misogyny but the
concepts are different. I had to spend time to work out what the correct
antonym was. The correct language would be misandropy and misogny or
andropy and feminism I think - though I'm no language expert. Misogyny
means woman hater and is a negative term whereas feminist is woman lover
or female pride which is a positive term. Men who are proud to be men
are immediately given negative labels in modern society.
There are few organisations lobbying for men's rights but many well
funded ones for women's. Of course there's a greater need for change in
the treatment of men than women. There's still a mountain of change to
achieve equality. But this is the goal and this is why I consider myself
an equalitist - a person who believes that all people are equal and
treats them as such.
I don't feel any ire towards pseudo-feminists. There are many hypocrites
and I'm one of them. I'm a suicidal wreck who fights for people's right
to live long lives. I'm sure there are other examples of my hypocrisy too.
I'm thankful that I have the ability to see some of my hypocrisy.
Pseudo-feminists don't. They get what they want from men and take pride
in women's right to do this. They generalise about men based on their
prejudices just as many men did fifty years ago and, sadly, still do.
This property of generalisation is perhaps what is the fundamental
problem. Some people just can't understand that a person is an
individual. Like psychiatrists they need to apply labels rather than
consider the person in this moment in time. Even a label that is 99.9%
accurate still misjudges one person in every thousand. There's no label
in psychiatry that's anywhere near that accurate and there's no label in
society either.
The drive towards an advanced civilisation will be driven by
equalitists, not feminist, not pseudofeminists, not andropyists, nor
pseudoandropyists.
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