feels like. The dickheads who talk about hearing voices as the sole
expeience of psychosis are describing the tip of the iceberg but also
not understanding that this is also a common experience (in the way they
talk about it).
Many don't realise the inner dualogue or dialogue as a conversation. It
is a thought conversation but it could easily be interpreted as a voice
conversation. The thoughts may sound like voices more than thoughts, or
not. Since we have little language available to describe our experience
of consciousness in a way which is communicable there's many misperceptions.
An auditory hallucination to me sounds like it is something which is
heard. This is the specific sense I would attribute to the term auditory
hallucination. This is very different to how the term is used.
Psychosis itself...the stuff which totally freaks people out...is a
mixed experience. There is a significant shift in internal reality then
there are the interpretations which people give it. For example thought
control. This is a very real experience to the person going through it.
It can be deeply confusing and painful. Then there are the
interpretations which people use to try to understand this new
experience which doesn't fit in with previous experiences (Bayesian
theory of the mind?). Some perceive it as alien control, others perceive
it as the control of secret organisations, others perceive it as the
influence god and there are lots of other interpretations of the core
experience. The biomedial model considers it a malfunctioning brain.
I still lack the ability to communicate the experiences which I had.
Currently I a going through...not real psychosis. Or perhaps it is real
psychosis but I can handle it most of the time. Not sure. To have
learned to handle acute psychosis and continue to work as I did a few
years ago sounds impossible but..well...I know what I went through.
"hell on Earth" does not convey what I went through.
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