Saturday, 2 July 2011

One day I ranted at the queen

That was probably a big mistake. Needed to do it though.

What any nation has in the future as wealth is probably going to be human brain power. Currently this is still a privilege, not a right. This nation and other nations need well educated people. This is why we need free education for life.

There is a health economics argument too. I could guess that, in general, people with degrees are richer. I could guess that their children will often have degrees as well. Not always but I guess it is often this cycle of privilege repeats.

This creates the inequalities between rich and poor which contributes to the terrible statuistics about life expectancy. In general the poor die a lot sooner than the rich. I know the mentally ill die a lot earlier than the rest. This is the new reason why psychiatrists pathologise mental illness. They are playing the role of parents in a way but their patients are not their biological children. I would pathologise the government which took away free university education.

The problem is there's a recession on. The smart bankers have fucked it up again. Something must be cut because there's less money circulating. Fear of recession means people spend less and save more. This means less people are working. This means the government has less money so they have to cut spending somewhere.

The problem is knowing what's worth keeping and what's worth cutting. Disability benefits are effectively being cut and for many the stress of the transition will not be good. Many of those looked after by the welfare state are going to die earlier. That's what the eivdence says from studies of poverty and life expectancy.

The problem is any charity can use that argument to get what they need for the poor or disabled. They can block government decisions using the risk of death in the longer term as a reason to stop a decision.

The real problem is when people can't understand what the risk of death is from the decisions they make. The government clearly lacks capacity to make good decisions in the best interests of the people. They just make decisions and let the next lot fix their mistakes.

In a recession the whole economic thing is important but...well I think understanding what the true impact of a decision on the life of the people is also pretty fucking important too.

I should have written a letter to her. Instead I was probably displacing anger from a business deal gone bad. I drank several pints and spent the day at a protest. My favourite protest of the year. It was marred by abgry kids smashing up stuff. I went to look for their leaders but couldn't find them. I ended up in trafalgar square. I ranted at a police line. I don't remember how or why I got out at green park. Probably because I needed a piss. Then somehow I ended up at what I hoped would be a party. It was a bunch of protestors who had set up camp in a park near the palace. There waqs no beer there though. Having done all that on an empty stomach I finally managed to sleep. I think I mananged to sleep sitting up. Then I had breakfast and went home.

Would I do it again? I don't know. It was totally reckless and done on the spur of the moment. It was pure madness by any definition. I was incoherent and babbling nonsense.

I should probably write to her to say sorry. But then she'd know who I was. I was no one. Just a blogger. Just a drunk. Just mentally ill. And I couldn't take being thought of as a hero.


I was just angry and....I still have something

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We It comes in part from an appreciation that no one can truly sign their own work. Everything is many influences coming together to the one moment where a work exists. The other is a begrudging acceptance that my work was never my own. There is another consciousness or non-corporeal entity that helps and harms me in everything I do. I am not I because of this force or entity. I am "we"