What if I'm actually useful? It is very hard for me to see this but perhaps I'm seeing it a little more. It makes it even harder for me to take my life.
This was implicitly part of my old plan to deal with a semi-constant death wish. The altruistic route - supposedly serving the greater good - may work for some because they are forced to continue living for the value they provide.
This is unfair on the individual. Everyone has the right to die regardless of their value. We are not property. We are people. Each individual owns their own life and when they want it no more they should have the right to die.
Death is, of course, suffering for those who love and care for an individual but sadly death is also a part of life. Death can lead to a loss to society too but, again, this is part of life.
Few can understand why death is an answer for a few. Not enough people understand what pain drives a person to contemplate the cessation of their existence. Even fewer can understand the pain of contemplating living but this is something I suffer alone.
I have one lifetime I don't want. It is one lifetime I would give to the greater good but not to suffer more. I give it to...I give it for my reasons and to what I want. And when I am ready I expect an assisted suicide.
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