with psychosis and are part of the a diagnosis of schizophrenia (but as
a single symptom are not enough).
This bit is where my lack of ability with language becomes a problem so
bear with me.
An auditory hallucination is 'delusional' communication through the
aural channel. My experience of this is around the time of my first
hospitalisation. I was listening to a drum and bass mix by Ray Keith. At
some point I began to communicate with the MC and he was communicating
back. The responses were out of possibility for a drum and bass tune and
the responses from the MC's voice answered my questions. This is an
auditory halluncination in my simplistic understanding. I must admit I
used enthogeons to get to this state, along with very high number of
stressors and it was a fascinating and powerful experience.
A few years I went through ego death or acute psychosis or the startling
phase. For a long period I felt controlled by another force or entity. I
had many explanations for what that force or entity was. I recieved
unusual forms of communication though very rarely were they auditory
hallucinations as described above. I received messages from TV programs
that wasn't part of the content of the words spoken through "stressing"
of certain words or parts of words however these weren't auditory
hallucinations as I would define them. The words have been received
through the aural signal path and the delusion began after the sound
signal have been interpreted.
Not everyone goes through the same experience. But there is the problem
of language and its limitation in this area. The English language is not
suitably constructed in lay terminology to express the internal
experience of the mind. What I'm talking about may have an academic
language I am unaware of however my search into this area has lead to
more confusion.
At present I experience a mix of experiences of internal reality and
interpretation of external reality. Importantly there are thoughts that
are consider not 'mine', i.e. there is "I" within the stream of thoughts
that I used to assume was my I. Now there is "I" and there is we. I'm
explaining this really badly.
Basically the inner voice that lots of people have, the inner
conversation or the committee in their head. The common state of
awareness is that these are all part of the self. My experience is that
"I" am one consciousness within the many that exist in my head.
In a paper by Professor Marius Romme published in the British Journal of
Psychiatry in 1992 he explained that in his study of coping voice
hearers not a single one experienced auditory hallucinations at the time
of the study. In fact they had a state of consciousness similar to mine.
He used the term "ego dystonia" however upon Googling it the word was
different to what I understood the word to mean from Professor Romme's
paper.
Psychiatric terms used to describe symptoms of the experience of
psychosis include "thought broadcast", "thought insertion" and
"thought...errr.......................withdrawal." People talk about the
voice in their head (well they don't, but that's another issue).
Auditory hallucinations are possible.
Is my confusion making any sense? Am I a voice hearer and if so are you
a voice hearer?
I love your photos - who knew Cockfosters could be so photogenic?
ReplyDeleteWhen I learned about schizophrenia in the seventies, auditory hallucinations ("voices") were not diagnostic - changes in affect (feelings), autistic features, loosened thinking and ambivalence were the cardinal diagnostic symptoms - voices were secondary.
Maruis Romme and Sandra Escher have shown that only about 10% of those who hear voices are in contact with mental health services...
If you seek out the UK Hearing Voices Network there are people who can tell you how they learned to control their distressing voices - this may assist. People I know who have achieved control of their voices prefer to live with the positive voices and understand the negative voices as a sort of "burglar alarm" - a warning that there is some stressor they need to manage, but that in the same way as the cat can trigger a burglar alarm, not all warnings are of real danger, but all need to be investigated.
Take care
Thanks Phil. And thanks for the feedback on the photos.
ReplyDeleteThat's useful information too. I read through the HVN's publication on the Mind site while I was going through "it" and I'm about half way through reading Accepting Voices.
Bentall also states that people 10% of all people have a psychotic experience in their lifetime but I haven't read the study. Jacqui Dillon who's the new head of the HVN (and pretty damn sexy) also mentioned either 80% or 20% of voice hearers are actually mad though I don't know what her definition of mad was.
Its interesting. DSM-IV states that only 1 criterion A symptom is required for a diagnosis of schizophrenia if delusions are bizarre or consist of a voice keeping a running commentary on a person's thoughts or behaviours or two or more voices conversing with each other. Perhaps they've updated the diagnosis now?
In the end I came through it by fighting for control, a battle I never really won. I don't know if it's "schizophrenia" or not though. I'm not a doctor. They tend to give me other diagnoses but none of them can agree on what I am.
Has the alarm way to think of them worked for you?