Monday 22 November 2010

A plan for self-termination

Well, a sketch really. Just one or four years as the end point.

Not sure I'll be able to get this approved by Dignitas. Doesn't matter
really. I have effective but messy means to get what I want. The end.

My only desire apart from my pseudo-altruistic bullshit is to end this
shit of a life. I'll do it too but now, having found a peaceful option,
I have the time to wait and jump through the necessary hoops. It will be
on my terms. I doubt very much that in a year or even four there'll be
any change in my desire to die. But the option is there.

This gives me hope. This gives me a plan. This gives me what I want
though I have to wait. The money doesn't matter. Nor the time. I can
finally be rid of this shit of a life.

In the meantime I'll work my fucking arse off and stand the sickness
that is humanity and life and living. The light at the end of the tunnel
is a sleep I never wake up from.

I'm happier just thinking about that prospect. Happy days.

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About Me

We It comes in part from an appreciation that no one can truly sign their own work. Everything is many influences coming together to the one moment where a work exists. The other is a begrudging acceptance that my work was never my own. There is another consciousness or non-corporeal entity that helps and harms me in everything I do. I am not I because of this force or entity. I am "we"