I mean heavy as in complex. Deeply so. I've become interested because...well...for many reasons.
The whole field of mental illness is of interest because I'm mentally ill. Schizophrenia is a diagnosis I've avoided even though I smoke a lot of cannabis. Or I did. Not anymore. Much less.
I've explored the realms of conscious experience more than most. Some wouldn't survive. The labels applied to my being are ones which wreck a person's life. And mine is a wreck. But it is mine and I have what I have to offer to the world.
My life experience and crises lead me on a path. I changed in that time. I changed through my experiences. I see value or chose to seek value in my experience of the human condition, my personal experience of life and being.
My journey was not as easy as for others. A doctor once told me I was mentally ill. In essence he told me my being was wrong and my type should be removed from the human race. This doctor used the paradigm of medicine to explain my individuality was unwanted.
Go fucking work the rest of this shit out yourself. Seek your own answers. Fuck. Isn't it obvious what psychiatry is doing?
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