How can I stop myself being an arsehole?

A simple but strange rule is I don't fight for myself. At least consciously. I will fight tooth and nail for principles, equality and my fellow human being.

I have learned not to fight for me. The simple reason is if I did I would be a manipulative psychopathy. Instead my ability is there to serve others.

I enforce this hard. I could, by my life story alone, be a terror. My acceptablity and frankly my belief is based on separating my evil ways from value for my self.

There are exceptions. They usually involve far greater loss or risk of loss to me though. No one gets this path to being an arsehole, one I chose. I chose because that's what it takes.

I have come to be used to being an arsehole. But I do my utmost to ensure while being an arsehole I do good and I don't do it for my benefit.

I do it for a cause I'm alienated from. There are many of those. I know people who are professionals in this area of making change may hate me and my kind. They do it for money though. I aim to protect what I do by m.aking sure that it has no value for me. None but making a difference. Somehow. Anyhow.

My ability is sadly being an arsehole. And I deliver. And if I were different my ability would be used for my benefit. I'm who I am though.

Just a drunk.